Style Invitational Week 1483: Pun for the Roses Our famous racehorse name ‘breeding’ contest. Plus winning phrases that work as Wordle grids. Image without a caption By Pat Myers April 7, 2022 at 10:07 a.m. EDT "A brief Tinder love story: Swipe right, spend the night, take flight." It's Hildy Zampella's winning entry in our Wordle-phrase contest. See the rest below. (The Washington Post illustration) Comment Add to your saved stories Save Gift Article Share Click here to skip down to the results of our Wordle phrase contest. “Breed” Happy Jack with Make It Big and name the foal Ecstatic Jack Iron Works x Enough Already = Iron“StopsWorking” Clapton x Apprehend = Clapton Irons Yes! After another iffy year in so many ways, we once again are on the traditional schedule for the running of the Kentucky Derby and, with it, our most popular contest of the year, usually generating some 4,000 entries for the Empress to ponder. This week: At the bottom of this page is a list of 100 of the 300-some horses nominated for the 2022 Triple Crown races: the Kentucky Derby, Preakness Stakes and Belmont Stakes. “Breed” any two names and name the “foal” to humorously play off both parents’ names, as in the examples above. (Yes, we know they’re almost all male. We do not care.) As in actual thoroughbred racing, a name may not exceed 18 characters including spaces, but those characters may include punctuation and numerals. You may run words together to save space, but the name should be easy to read. Please write entries in the A x B = C format of the second and third example above, and note the formatting instructions on this week’s entry form and The Style Conversational. They’re easy, but the E and especially her longtime volunteer sorter, Loser Jonathan Hardis, need you to follow the directions so the entries can be sorted by horse name. Submit up to 25 entries at wapo.st/enter-invite-1483 (no capitals in the Web address). Deadline is Monday, April 18; results appear on Derby weekend: May 8 in print, May 5 online. Winner gets the Clowning Achievement, our Style Invitational trophy. Second place receives, somewhat apropos to this week’s contest, Poo-Dough, a Play-Doh-inspired mold and compound to make, well, yeah. “Looks like the real thing (smells much better)” and even comes with some fake corn kernels and peanut pieces to add authenticity to your product. Decorate your yard! Donated by Invite fan Dan Huff. Other runners-up win their choice of our “For Best Results, Pour Into Top End” Loser Mug or our “Whole Fools” Grossery Bag. Honorable mentions get one of our new lusted-after Loser magnets, “A Small Jester of Appreciation” or “Close, but Ceci N’est Pas un Cigare.” First Offenders receive only a smelly tree-shaped air “freshener” (FirStink for their first ink). See general contest rules and guidelines at wapo.st/inviteFAQ. The headline “Funny Fives Faves” is by Jesse Frankovich; Craig Dykstra wrote the honorable-mentions subhead. Join the lively Style Invitational Devotees group on Facebook at on.fb.me/invdev; “like” the Style Invitational Ink of the Day on Facebook at bit.ly/inkofday; follow @StyleInvite on Twitter. The Style Conversational: The Empress’s weekly online column discusses each new contest and set of results. See this week’s, published late Thursday, April 7, at wapo.st/conv1483. And from The Style Invitational four weeks ago ... FUNNY FIVES FAVES: Results of our Week 1479 Wordle phrase contest Our Week 1479 contest — in which the Empress ripped off the Nerd Game of the Hour, asking for phrases that would work as New York Times Wordle grids, proved, well, a challenge. “I never thought I’d come up with anything for this contest,” lamented one Loser. Another: “Stop this madness!” The rule was that once a letter was in the right, “green” place for the final word, it had to stay there for subsequent words. 4th place: (The Washington Post illustration) MARCH MAKES MUCKY MUCUS MUSIC ^ The springtime singer’s lament. (Sarah Walsh, Rockville, Md.) 3rd place: NEVER TALKS ABOUT LGBTQ STUFF invite0410-wordle-never (The Washington Post illustration) ^ What a Florida teacher does now. (Duncan Stevens, Vienna, Va.) 2nd place and the Day of the Dead Pop-Tarts: MORON SENDS COLOR CUBES TWEET DAILY invite0410-wordle-moron (The Washington Post illustration) ^ Why on earth would you keep announcing your X/6 Wordle score? (Jon Gearhart, Des Moines) And the winner of the Clowning Achievement: RATES DATES MATES SATES HATES A brief Tinder love story: Swipe right, spend the night, take flight. (Hildy Zampella, Alexandria, Va.) Fives below: Honorable mentions BEERS JEERS WEARY TEARY A Commanders fan’s usual quarter-by-quarter experience. (Steve Smith, Potomac, Md.) BULLY RAIDS, BOMBS. CINCH? UHHHH . . . The remarkable turn of events in Ukraine. (Duncan Stevens) BRIEF BRADY BREAK When you realize that being driven into the ground by giant linemen beats being driven up the wall by your kids. (Jesse Frankovich, Lansing, Mich.) FAULT FAUCI, TRUST SEUSS Fox on docs. (Chris Doyle, Denton, Tex.) BANJO KAZOO DISCO COMBO The least frequently hired musical ensemble. (Jonathan Jensen, Baltimore) SIXTY TIMES ZILCH Success rate of you-know-who’s post-election lawsuits. (Mark Raffman, Reston, Va.) SOLID WASTE AUDIT CHIEF How your résumé can describe the year you spent dumpster-diving. (Chris Doyle) MARIE: BLADE ADIEU AHEAD! The 1793 guillotine squad lets the queen know what’s coming. (Kathy El-Assal, Middleton, Wis.) GRAVY TRAIN WRECK Welcome to inflation. (Mark Raffman) BLECH GROSS SOGGY Back-to-school reviews are in for the cafeteria. (Leif Picoult, Rockville, Md.) CHINA INDIA SYRIA NEPAL JAPAN QATAR Oh shoot, I thought I was playing Worldle! (Bill Dorner, Indianapolis) TRASH TRUTH, TRUST TRUMP: What suffices for the GOP platform these days. (Jonathan Jensen) TWICE- DAILY SNACK: EXTRA- LARGE PIZZA Your Mama’s diet. (Chris Doyle) POLAR DUMBO MUMBO JUMBO Palinspeak. (Jesse Frankovich) SHINY- PATED ASSET- LADEN PAPER OWNER (Jeff Bezos owns The Washington Post.) (Jesse Frankovich) And Last: PRIZE: OLIVE GREEN LLAMA VOMIT What makes Losers try so hard for Invite ink. (Jon Gearhart) And Even Laster: MYERS NAMES OTHER LOSER? FIXED! Trump enters the Invitational, gets no ink. (Steve Benko, Southport, Conn.) And Lastest of All: MYERS MOTTO: SORRY, LOSER. ENTER AGAIN! And I always do. (Jon Gearhart) And Even Lasterest of All: LOSER MINDS THINK ALIKE Why the Empress gets so many entries with the same lame jokes. (Submitted by Jesse Frankovich AND Chris Doyle) Still running — deadline Monday night, April 11: Make new words from any of 36 ScrabbleGrams letter sets. See wapo.st/invite1482. DON’T MISS AN INVITE! Sign up here to receive a once-a-week email from the Empress as soon as The Style Invitational and Style Conversational go online every Thursday, complete with links to the columns. The horses to “breed” in Week 1483: Click here to see the list as a printable, searchable four-column Google Doc. Absolute Ruler American Icon American Xperiment Apprehend Barber Road Bargaining Power Be There Beyond Best Bletchley Park Bloodline Boise Bureau Bye Bye Bobby Cant Be Doin That Charge It Clapton Classic Causeway Concept Conclusive Congressman Courvoisier Crown Pride Cyberknife Dean’s List Doppelganger Early Voting Echo Zulu Efficiency Electability El Paso Enough Already Enthrallment Epicenter Epoch Ethereal Road Flying Drummer Forbidden Kingdom Glider Goin to the Show Grantham Gunfighter Happy Jack Hopper Howling Time Improper Cisco Live Get ready for Cisco Live 2022 in Las Vegas Advertisement By Cisco Live Bringing the education, inspiration, and fun of Cisco Live back to you. Make it happen - attend the tech event of the year, June 12-16, 2022. Register today In Due Time Iron Works Kerouac Long Term Major General Make It Big Messier Miss Everything Momentous Money Supply Morello Mr White Mugged Nabokov Octane On Thin Ice Overrule Paper Mirror Pappacap Particular Peaceful Waters Presidential Rattle N Roll Rhetoric Rich Strike Rockefeller Script Secret Oath Seventh Letter Shake Em Loose Simplification Slim Man Slow Down Andy Smarten Up Smile Happy Strike Hard Strobe Summer Is Tomorrow Surpassing Take Action Tawny Port The Thunderer Tiz the Bomb Top Secret Trademark Un Ojo Unraptured Verbal Volcanic We the People Wharton White Abarrio Win the Day Witty Zozos